You know that saying, 'Kill them with kindness.' ? I find it becoming very rare. In fact, I find that the survivor rate is still pretty high. Since when did we become so mean?
Proverbs 25: 21-22, states: If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat, and if he is thirsty, give him water to drink. For in so doing, you will heap burning coals on his head, and the LORD will reward you.
I'm intrigued by these two statements. It speaks about showing compassion to someone who has wronged you and receiving reward from God for doing so. In showing kindness to that enemy of yours, it will in turn cause them discomfort. This discomfort can maybe lead to them seeking forgiveness from you or just hating you more.....whichever comes first.
So....What is it about an act of kindness that can "kill"?
It reduces emotional distance between two individuals Some people are fighting and sometimes losing, a hard battle. You may end up being their target for frustration relief. On some occasions, they need compassion in their life. An act of kindness can actually make the person feel less aggressive towards you. It can make them feel guilty for their actions toward you and build a bond. Not everyone will become your friend, some people will always hate you but at least you aren't stooping to their level.
You show them they can't control/defeat you Some people thrive off of knowing they can have a control over your emotions and set off your day. By showing them kindness, you show them they cannot have control over you. Your smile and your general aura will let them know you aren't going to be defeated by anything they throw at you. You will not shy away and you will not insult them to feed them any more ammunition to destroy you. When they see their antic has no effect on you.....They can become more aggressive in their attacks or they can just give up but who cares? Not you.
Kindness attracts more kindness Kindness attracts more positivity. When you're kind to someone, it makes them smile (generally). They may feel the urge to pass on the act of kindness. Someone who knows the situation of a tyrant coworker or family member, may be inspired by your acts of kindness towards your enemies. People tend to draw more towards you if you are kind. This can make your haters jealous.
It makes you feel better Being kind and compassionate towards others makes you feel good inside. It makes you smile, it lifts your mood. It makes you connect more with God when you realize He showed you compassion when you were against Him once. It improves your life holistically. Less stress. Less headaches. You can actually enjoy life.
"But to be a kind killer, your kindness must be genuine."
Your kindness won't be true kindness if you go in thinking, "This is soooo going to hurt/irritate my enemy!" In other words, you shouldn't be trying to hurt the same person who's currently hurting you. You shouldn't be trying to strategically shoot them in the foot for kicking you. Your kindness should never have an ulterior motive. Don't be Passive-aggressive either. Passive-aggressiveness is a tendency to engage in indirect expression of hostility through acts such as subtle insults, sullen behavior, stubbornness, or a deliberate failure to accomplish required tasks. If you're giving someone a gift, don't throw words at them when you do. Don't give them the silent treatment either. That's not kind.
Be kind because its the right thing to do. When I was in form 1, my teacher, the late Zennie De Silva, always made us repeat a quote and it stuck with me even to this day. She told us of all her teachings, this should be one that we carry with us for life. It was this.
"It doesn't matter who's looking at you, you do the right thing because it's the right thing to do." ~Zennie De Silva~
Showing kindness to someone who has hurt you is a difficult thing but it's not impossible. You'll have situations in life where you get hurt for showing kindness but do it anyway. It's the right thing to do and the best thing to do. It gets easier by the Grace of God. Forgive, be cheerful, smile, go forth and kill them with your kindness.
~Celine Elizabeth~